Demi Lovato’s Brush with Mental Insanity – It’s Only Just Begun

Now that I’ve already forwarded my political agenda today (ME FOR PRESIDENT!) (Actually that’s too much work… WILLOW SMITH FOR PRESIDENT!), let’s get to the real news. Demi Lovato, whom I actually know nothing about besides that fact that I’m supposed to know her name, checked into rehab! Yesssss! It begins. Another one bites the dust. And good for her because let’s face it, she just got a whole lot more interesting.

At this point the details are a little spotty and no one really knows why she checked in but does it really even matter? She’s a little bland. Honestly she needed something. I just can’t WAIT to find out what exactly it is. Some people claim now that she’s seeking help for cutting and an eating disorder. The eating disorder is such a cop out but the cutting… ooooooooh. Now we’re getting somewhere. Of course cutting is a very serious condition and I don’t condone anyone doing it but we all know Demi Lovato probably got a paper cut and her publicists were all, “now’s our chance!” If it’s actually serious I really hope she gets the help she needs but… my word that is interesting. I think this is a first? A tween star going to rehab for cutting. Good for Demi, I never thought she would amount to much, then she goes and paves the way with a whole new affliction for young female stars. I didn't see that coming. Bravo Demi. A true trailblazer. There was also some word that she got into a physical altercation with a girl that was on tour with her… Please let that girl speak now. Her silence is killing me. What I wouldn’t give to have seen that. I also can’t help but wonder how “physical” it actually was and I truly can’t help but imagine how weak (or strong…so terribly strong, perhaps superhuman? A radioactive side-effect?) the force from a Demi Lovato punch feels.

The real question here is where does Taylor Swift fit into all of this. Somewhere deep down I just know she’s involved. You know it too, don’t pretend. Man do I hope Taylor Swift goes to rehab for cutting, or anything for that matter. Wouldn’t that be so great? Except you KNOW Taylor Swift is the most fucked up out of all those girls. She tries to play it so cool like she’s so wholesome but everyone is just terrified of her. She definitely gets so wild. Too wild frankly. Like wild to the point that Lindsay Lohan wants nothing to do with her. Damn, Taylor Swift is crazy.

I think the most exciting thing about this whole Demi/Taylor Swift ordeal is the inevitable affliction that Willow Smith will come up with, because it’ll obviously be the best one yet, and probably ever. Willow has a lot of dignity, I think he/she is like a good-will ambassador to the Obama campaign or something (not factual information, don’t quote me on that), and will certainly behave shimself for the next year or so, but you know he/she is going to get CRAZY once 11 hits. All that fierce hair-whipping will certainly prove too much for one person to take and I for one cannot wait to see what he/she turns to for “help.” What I wouldn’t give to be able to see into the future right now. Where is my crystal ball when I need it? The anticipation is killing me.

JETZ SCALE: WAIT WHAT WAS I TALKING ABOUT? OH YEAH…

4 JETZ FOR DEMI – LET’S SEE WHAT SHE COMES UP WITH NEXT

5 JETZ FOR WILLOW OBVIOUSLY

AND…

I’M SIMPLY TOO SCARED TO JETZ SCALE TAYLOR SWIFT. PLEASE BUY HER NEW ALBUM… FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY.

MID-TERM ELECTIONS – November 2010

Today, November 2^nd, 2010, is a day that many people are considering an “important” day in the history of our country. It’s mid-term Election Day AKA the day that Democrats will lose all voice in this country to psycho hyper-religious tea partiers and what little sanity that was left in this country will be lost. I mean what is there to do at this point? Seriously. Nothing. There aren’t even sane candidates running anymore. It’s either the hyper-religious tea party freaks or Republicans masked as “liberal” Democrats. The politics have been so messed up in this country for so long that no one really knows which way is up anymore and people have lost sight of what is right.

In my opinion it’s like this, you just have to grin and bear it. This country is a messed up place that’s more divided than ever in the middle of more crisis than anyone knows what to do with and everyone is more eager to look for someone to blame than actually do something about it. Okay, Obama was a lot of talk, but how much did people expect from him? Clearly the moon (which we will no doubt soon be inhabiting). The state of the country, and the entire world, is so fragile that what’s so wrong with having an intellectual leader who hopes for the best and ran on a platform of hope? Must we just be miserable and fight about everything?

Yeah, we’re all fired up by what we think needs to happen and what we believe to be right, but frankly not everyone agrees with each other. And we aren’t in charge of the country last time I checked (at least no one I know). We need to find some sort of happy middle ground where everyone can try to coexist without fighting one another about beliefs. People lately have become so blinded by themselves and so caught up in this strange “I’m better than everyone and I’m the only person that’s right” American way of thinking that we in this incredibly tense place as a country.

Also, I can’t understand how anyone thinks they have any control of the government or the way we live anymore. Honestly, Obama doesn’t even have that power. I am no advocate, by any means, but there is something very wrong with the most “progressive country in the world” where it’s actually illegal if you are openly gay to serve in the military for your country that is in war with practically everyone, a country that forces it’s presence to be known everywhere; a country that could use any help it can get because it’s so involved with everyone else’s affairs. If I sound disheartened about the state of America, and the world, well, if you think about it, I am. It’s just all so frustrating. But at this point I’ve had to stop thinking about it. In my opinion, the best we can do is vote for the people who we think are right and pray that some sort of sanity returns to politics. We don’t need super right-wing or super left-wing. What we really need is a middle ground. There can’t be this battle between Republican and Democrat because now it’s forcing these super psycho candidates to run for office, and trust me that’s the last thing we want. We really need some level-headed candidates to put into office. People who can actually do the job right, who have a vision to make America better. Actually better. Not just their version of better. People who listen to what the American people actually want, can intuit what they need, and build from there.

I think everyone needs to stop worrying about conservative/liberal, Democrat/Republican, because it is stopping us from getting anywhere. Start focusing on bringing everyone together and then working as a whole to make America great again. Apparently I’m a patriot right now. But seriously, I like to be optimistic. I honestly want this country, and this world to be great. I want to be proud of the place that I live, and have it not just be a place for me to step. Is that so much to ask? Hmm, I do need a job though. Maybe I can be President? How do I do that? Where do I apply? Does anyone know who can I forward my resume to…? Willow Smith?

JETZ SCALE: CURRENTLY ZERO JETZ – JETZ THAT ARE SO COLD THAT IF YOU PUT YOUR TONGUE TO THEM IT WOULD GET STUCK… LETS HEAT UP AMERICA’S JETZ, YEAH?